ARCHIVES!!
i hate my boss, i hate my boss, i need a new job,
i need a new job, my boss is crazy, my boss is crazy, my boss sucks, my boss
sucks, job search, job search
WELCOME TO THE ARCHIVES ;-)
BROUGHT TO YOU BY:
c'mon click on a link and help us out
4/26/2007
Today my boss introduced us to his wife, who is a transsexual. He
has pictures of her in his office, but perhaps those have been photoshopped,
because this woman looks a lot more manly in person (a lot). Part of me is
screaming "you should have said something," and part of me kind of thinks he's
cool for it.
I honestly never suspected,
New Orleans, LA
We give this one to your boss. In fact we think he's damn cool to treat his wife just like any other husband would. People love who they love, and their relationships deserve respect. We've always been told beauty is on the inside, so it's time we start acting on it. But I do have to say, I would have loved to be there for the introductions. ;-)
Cool: 8 out of 10
4/26/2007
Today my boss walked in with his collar popped. I thought it was a joke
so I laughed. He just stared at me… apparently he's being serious.
Are You Kidding Me,
OH
Dear Kidding, Your boss should quit and go work for Abercrombie where popped collars are still hip. Or he should quit and work on a time machine. This machine could transport him to a period when popped collars meant he wouldn't be a virgin until he could afford to get someone drunk enough to be impressed with the fact that he manages people. He may be your boss, but in the hierarchy of life, he's staring up at rock bottom.
Ridiculous: 6 out of 10
4/25/2007
Today my boss checked me out. I'm 100% sure of it. I was walking down the
hallway and I saw his eyes do a once-over... then stare. He is married and 20
years my senior.
What?
Violated,
TX
Dear Violated, Please immediately replace the name on your desk as "Hunk of Meat," because surely that's all you are. Next time you have a conversation with your boss, stare at his crotch the entire time. His eyes are now right between his legs. Treat others the way they treat you - isn't that the saying? Men rarely get that intrusive treatment and it's about time he knows what it feels like. Good luck keeping your lunch down.
4/25/2007
My boss misuses words, like he says "I'm so gracious" when he means thank
you, and uses the word "myself" a lot, incorrectly. This
wouldn't be so bad, except we are a PR firm, so rhetoric is pretty important.
Should I say something?
Gracious,
NYC
HA! I'd say something like "my 9 year old niece just learned the difference between using I and myself in the third grade. Did you know that you only use myself when..." Or, since you work in a PR firm, you could send a press release to your boss' boss about how moronic he is. People should be informed.
Dumb: 7 out of 10
4/23/2007
Today my boss made a joke about the Holocaust, basically laughing that a
German guy we know would gas all his enemies. Everyone got silent and it was so
awkward. What should we have said?
Horrified,
NJ
Hey Horrified, That's a real shame. Apparently Don Imus got a new job already because you're working for him. Awkward jokes can only be repaid with more awkward jokes. Accompanied by a huge optimistic smile, lots of head-nodding and intense eye contact, just say: "Anybody else have major historical world tragedy to laugh about?"
Wrong: 9 out of 10
4/23/2007
My new boss can't type so today he printed out all of his emails, scribbled a
response on the paper, and then had me respond to all of them as him.
This honestly wouldn't be so bad, except after scribbling the response he pushed
the papers off his desk and let them float to the floor, leaving me to scramble
to pick them up. They are all over the floor. What should I do?
maybe he likes to watch me bend over,
NYC
You poor thing. Either your new boss is the biggest asshole we've come across or he has a neurological disorder. I'm not making excuses for him, just giving you the heads up. Some people have a hard time realizing that other people exist outside of their reality. They don't realize that you are a fully developed person with emotions. So, the first thing you have to do is figure out if he's an asshole... or retarded. If he's an asshole, then standing up for yourself will help. Most of the time they just need to see you have a backbone. If it's the other... well then... I'd start posting resumes.
Ridiculous: 10 out of 10
4/23/2007
Today my boss told me she doesn't like my skirt. It's just a normal work
skirt I wear occasionally and is completely appropriate for the office. What's
her deal??
The Devil Wears Skirts,
CO
Dear Devil, So your boss has different taste in clothing… we recommend sarcasm. "Oh really you don't like it? Can I have a piece of paper to jot that down so I don't forget? Your opinion on my wardrobe from the waist down is of utmost important to me." OR you could pretend like you didn't hear her: "Thank you! I get SO many compliments when I wear this." Smile with a twinkle in your eye and move on with your day - she sucks.
Rude: 7 out of 10
4/20/2007
Because it is 4/20 we wanted to give our readers a little something extra to
enjoy during the holiday. These are the web searches that brought readers
to TodayMyBoss today:
** I work for a university and my boss is crazy
** my boss can't speak english
** help my boss is crazy
** my boss sucks
** boss is crazy
** appropriate language for telephone boss out sick
** i hate my boss
** my boss is sexy
** why me god? i need a new job
4/20/2007
I was lectured, today by my boss, on the meaning of the word didactic.
I don't want to get in another useless discussion about definitions but isn't
that ironic?
Editing,
Harvard
Yes, that's the best real life example of irony I've heard in awhile. Unlike Alanis, we often we want more from cosmic irony than just bad luck. It has to sting a little. Like being forced to have a discussion about bees while you are getting stung by a bee and your boss is a bee. Wait... back up... nevermind. You come up with the example and we'll just give you kudos. G'luck dealing with the boss.
Ridiculous: 6 out of 10
4/20/2007
Today my boss told me I have a great smile, which is a little awkward, but he
also said the same thing to me yesterday. What if he says it tomorrow?
Enough already.
Frowning,
South Carolina
Hey Frowning, That is really awkward. Next time he says it, punch him in the balls and say, "No, YOU have a nice smile!" But if you like your job enough to put up with these little misplaced compliments, you could just completely ignore his presence and not make eye contact. Nothing is more uncomfortable than just plain old not answering. Or even better - never smile again.
Creepy: 5 out of 10
4/13/2007
Today my boss asked me at 1pm to prepare 3 class lectures for tomorrow and
cover a professor's classes. Granted the prof had a true emergency and
reason for not being here but am I insane for thinking this is an absurd thing
to ask of your research assistant to do in the last 2 weeks of the semester?
Stressed Out and Overworked Grad Student
BG, Ohio
In between preparing lectures and teaching the classes... can you also get me a cup of coffee? I like it with some milk and one packet of Splenda, lid tightly secured, coffee appropriately heated and delivered by the current Miss Universe. You’re a research assistant, not a tenured professor, which means you already have a job. Of course, your job comes without the perks of being able to shit on someone when you have to miss class, but for some reason I don't think you are the kind of person that would do a thing like that ;-)
Ridiculous: 8 out of 10
4/13/2007
Tomorrow we have a big all day meeting and today my boss asked all the women
in the office to wear heels to it. Then after he said "I'm sure you
all have a nice pair of pumps," I think just to show of that he knew shoe lingo?
I wore heels once (on Halloween) and was in pain for days.
What's up with that?
Sympathetic Male Coworker,
Atlanta, GA
Dear Sympathetic, we either have a 1950's style boss in a 2000 style office, or a man with a foot fetish the size of the Marble Arch. Nothing says "please step on my balls" quite like a relegation to wear heels. I have very little advice for you. You could maybe help the women out by keying him into the fact it is 2007, or possibly by saying you overheard a group of them talking about harassment. You know, you two could probably have this discussion man to man.
Misogynistic: 8 out of 10
4/13/2007
Today my boss spent almost her entire day watching clips on YouTube. I
know this because I walked by several times and saw it, and heard it the rest of
the day. I mean, I love YouTube as much as the next guy, but not all day long…
at work.
Trying to Get Stuff Done,
California
Dear Worker Bee, You need to take a break from actual responsibility and
explore the stock of ridiculousness at YouTube. Why are you working when your
boss isn't even looking, anyway? She has it right – get paid to relax, laugh and
not care what anyone thinks. Come to think of it, your boss should run for
president.
Ridiculous: 6 out of 10
RETURN TO MAIN PAGE BY CLICKING HERE
OUR FAVORITE THINGS
PerezHilton
Unethicist
Fabio Phone
Ask Jerri
RELATED TO WORK:
power perspective
OUR FRIENDS
LoveBScott
SinNoticiasDeStew
TheCultureWarrior
Cherry Bomb
Mz GoRightry
Maxspace
Ready or Loc
ADD US ON MYSPACE
BROUGHT TO YOU BY:
c'mon click on a link and help us out